


Your Touch

by toothIess



Category: Humans (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-25
Updated: 2018-05-25
Packaged: 2019-05-13 19:25:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,479
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14754833
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toothIess/pseuds/toothIess
Summary: Spoilers for S3ep2!  When Max told Leo that he was no longer a part of them something broke inside of him





	Your Touch

**Author's Note:**

> This is basically Leo's POV when Max tells him that he never truly belonged with them

Leo could still remember the look on Max's face when he had entered that room. His eyes refused to meet Leo's and he showed only very little emotions as if he hadn't been relieved to see Leo awake in the first place. Leo had wanted to use whatever strength that he had regained to pull Max in for an embrace like they always did, but something about Max's demeanor told him that he didn't want that. The synth seemed to keep his distance from him and made no effort to come any closer towards him. It was almost as if Leo hadn't just laid in a coma for God knows how long.

He listened how Max asked Mattie a couple of questions about Leo as if he wasn't there with them in the room. Leo wasn't sure what had changed in his brother's features, but he could clearly tell that there was something that Max refused to share with them. There had to be another reason why this man seemed to care little that Leo was awake.

Earlier Mattie had informed Leo that the synth part of his brain had been completely damaged because of Hester’s doing and that he was a human again. Leo needed Max to know that he was still on their side like he had always been.

"I can help," Leo offered. He was still lying on the cot while Max kept his distance from him and it wasn’t how he remembered his brother who used to have the kindest soul. Something must have happened while Leo had been awake, which was another reason why Leo felt like he needed to do something now. He had already lost enough time as it was. "I can be a bridge between us, between you and the humans." Leo observed Max’s face which showed little changes, but he didn’t seem too pleased with his suggestion. "What’s wrong?"

"Anger towards humans is growing. It isn’t save for you here," Max told them. "You both need to leave."

"What?" Leo asked in disarray.

Mattie rose up from the chair that she had been sitting on with a heavy frown. "But you are there leader," she said in disagreement as she eyed Max.

Max met her gaze. "And I still can’t protect them. The bomb changed everything. There is conflict coming."

"Then I'm with you," Leo said to make himself clear as to where his loyalty truly lied. "Always am one of you." And that was the way that Leo had always seen it. They had been there for him when he grown up and he had always felt as if he belonged with them. He had put so much effort into keeping them all safe and he cared for them. Him being human again wasn’t going to change that at all.

Max’s jaw clenched. "That was only ever partly true. Now it even true at all." He stared at Leo for a few moments. "I’m sorry. I’ll find a vehicle." Max turned around to head towards the door.

"Where is he supposed to go?" Mattie called after him.

"Somewhere safe," was the only reply that she got from him.

"Where are Mia and Niska?" Mattie went on, hoping that they would have a better solution."Do they know about this?"

Max walked closer towards the door. "They are gone!" With that his brother strode out of the room and closed the door behind him which left Mattie and Leo by themselves.

At that moment Leo felt overwhelmed by the feeling of loneliness when the person that he had always trusted the most in his life just blandly told him that he had never truly been a part of their family. That gave Leo the indication that they were only ever pretending around them and that they had never truly seen him as a part of them. It was almost as if Leo’s life had been nothing but a lie and that he had never truly belonged anywhere. Where else was he supposed to go now that the people that he still cared about had cast him aside as if he had been yesterdays trash. His father had created all of them and therefore Leo had assumed that they shared an unique bond together especially after Leo got his own synthetic brain after the incident. They had all helped him with getting used to the changes in his brain. Had that all been a lie too?

To Leo it was as if someone had pressed a knife deep between his ribs and he could feel the air slowly being pushed out of his lungs. It was a form of betrayal by the people that he saw as his family. He had spent pretty much his entire childhood as is he had been a part of them, but no that illusion had scattered away like ash in being caught in a rapid storm.

"He doesn’t actually mean it, Leo," Mattie tried to reassure him. She knew better than anyone how much his family meant to him. He had always been incredibly loyal to them and he would’ve died for them without question.

Leo swallowed as he took in a deep breath. "I don’t think he’s lying, Mattie, He doesn’t care about me anymore," he replied and he wished that he could’ve given her a different answer. In truth it hurt him to having to say those words out loud.

Mattie surprised him by laying her hand on his shoulder and her touch was so gentle that Leo thought that he had imagined it if he hadn’t seen her do it. Her dark eyes were focused on him and Leo could tell how much this entire situation effected her as well. She too had grown rather close with his family and seeing Max behave like that was something that she couldn’t wrap her mind around.

"I’m certain that Max is only doing this to get you to safety," she said to him. "He’s right about this place not being safe for two humans." To explain herself further she told him about the bombing that occurred only a few days ago and how synths had claimed to be responsible for it. Of course this had drastically changed the already damaged and thin bond between synths and humans. It wasn’t that strange that Max was expecting that a something tragic was bound to happen anytime soon.

"He should’ve just been honest with me," Leo softly replied. "He has never once kept the truth around me before. Max would always be the first who would come to me whenever he found something out. He isn’t someone who would keep things from me. It just doesn’t feel right. By just looking at him now I can tell that he’s constantly walking on eggshells here now that he’s under a lot of pressure. I guess that means that he doesn’t have any time for his human brother anymore. I don’t fit into his world any longer."

"Don’t say that. You’re still his brother, Leo," Mattie reminded him as she grabbed hold of his hand and intertwined their fingers together. Her skin felt so soft against hers that brought out a faint smile on Leo’s lips. He sure had missed her and being able to hear her talk again caused his heart to stir, but she didn’t notice the effect that she had on him.

Leo licked his lips. "Apparently I’m not. Else he would’ve at least properly acknowledged me when he just saw me. Instead he didn’t even seem that pleased to see me here as if I’ve been nothing but a burden for him by being in a coma all this time."

Mattie shook her head. "No one blames you for what happened and neither does Max. I’m sure that he has his reasons why he’s acting so cold-hearted towards you now and we might hear them within good time. We need to get out of here first."

"And go where?" Leo asked. "No that Max has just proclaimed his true feelings towards me there is nowhere else where I can go. I have no family left who is waiting for me."

"Perhaps it’s an option if I could take you to my house," Mattie suggested as she sat down on the edge of the cot so that she her shoulder was pressed against his. Her fingers were tracing soft patterns against his hand. "My father has moved away so there is enough space and I’m certain that my mom wouldn’t mind. Besides no one would look for you there. "

Leo could feel his skin pulsing by just looking at Mattie. When he had first met her he been incredibly cautious around her and he had built a wall around himself with the intention that she could break it. But bit by bit Mattie had succeeded into breaking down his wall and seeing glimpses of his true self. He had shown her images of himself which he hadn’t shared with anyone else.

Before Leo had been stabbed by Hester he had already came to realization that his feelings for Mattie were more than a close friendship. The desire to be around her grew closer every time that he smelled that jasmine perfume that she loved so much. He wanted to be the reason why Mattie was smiling every day, but Leo was a klutz when it came to expressing his romantic feelings. Besides Hester had been out there as well and the timing had been wrong and then he suddenly was entirely robbed of time when he slipped into a coma. But now as he was staring into those brown eyes of Mattie he allowed himself to believe that there was still a chance that he still had some time left to make things right. She seemed to have been waiting for him all this time.

"Are you sure that -" Leo wanted to disagree her generous offer, but Mattie shook her head.

"I’m not going to accept no for an answer. This will be the best place where you can get accustomed to being a human again and I’m going to help you," she insisted with a wide grin glued to her face.  
If Leo were to stay at the Hawkins residence that would give him the perfect opportunity to spent more time with Mattie without any one asking any questions. The thought already sent his heart racing and Leo hoped that he wasn’t blushing because Mattie would be able to see that.

He returned her smile. "You are a wonder, Mattie Hawkins." _And I do not deserve you_. He kept those thoughts to himself because he didn’t want to upset her.

The two of them continued to sit there for an unknown while as Mattie told him more about everything that had happened while he had been in a coma. She spoke in great length about how she felt responsible for being behind the dead of a hundred and ten thousand humans when she had activated that code to make all the synths conscious. Leo told her that wasn’t the truth and tried to console her by wrapping his arm around her waist as she rested her head on his shoulder. If someone didn’t deserve to walk around with that much guilt it was Mattie and Leo wished that he could take that pain away from her. He was going to try and make her realise that she was entirely wrong about that.

Eventually Anatole came to them to tell them there was a vehicle ready to take them away. Leo was slightly blown away when Max was there to help Mattie with escorting him out of the room. He leaned onto his brother, but Max stubbornly kept his lips together and didn’t utter as much as a word to them.

As they got outside the sunlight was so bright that Leo had to squint his eyes to be able to see anything. He had been surrounded in darkness for so long, but he was finally able to breath in the fresh air again. Leo hadn’t known that their hideout was nothing more than a railway because he had only ever seen this room that he had stayed in.

Together with another synth Max lifted Leo into the back of a pickup truck before he approached Anatole so that he could share a few words with him. Leo was panting as Mattie sat down beside him and tried to make him comfortable by helping him sit up right. Leo wasn’t sure what he would’ve done if he wouldn’t have Mattie there with him, his private angel.

Max returned to the vehicle with the same stern look on his face as before. "Gordon will take you as close to a train-station as he can possibly go," he said them, not showing much emotions.

Leo swallowed his bile as he called his brother’s name again in hope of any recognition from him. Max’s face remained as stern as it was and Leo decided to call him by the nickname he often used. "Maxie."

He slowly rose his hand onto the car for Max to hold. This was the final moment that Max could at least acknowledge that Leo had always been his brother and that they were family. If Max were to touch him one last time then Leo would knew that Max still cared for him and that had changed. The seconds ticked by slowly and Leo felt his anxiety increase.

He saw Max looking at his hand as if he wasn’t entirely certain what to do with it. It was a gesture which they had done countless of times before and Leo doubted that Max had forgotten what it meant. He didn’t want to know.  
When Max instead slammed onto the side of the car to let the driver know that it was time for them to leave Leo felt his heart shatter. The engine of the car came alive with as the car drove away towards the gate. All that Leo could do was keep his gaze transfixed upon the person who had just hurt him in the worst way imaginable, he had made Leo feel as if wasn’t worth anything.

While the car drove away Mattie could see how much Leo was aching because of Max’s heartless behaviour and so she pressed herself closer against him and rested her head onto his shoulder. It wasn’t much but it was the only comfort that she could provide Leo now as she saw him fighting against the tears that were fighting to get out.

Mattie didn’t say anything because she assumed that Leo wouldn’t appreciate that. She was kind of amazed when she felt how Leo intertwined their fingers again as he kept his gaze focused on the road behind them. Things would surely change now.


End file.
